Crimespree Magazine #56 Read online

  Charles Paris must find out who killed Marcus Steen, the theatrical tycoon with a fortune to leave to his young mistress Jacqui? And who killed Bill Sweet, the shady blackmailer with a supply of compromising photographs? He decides to investigate by assuming a variety of roles, among them that of the mythical Detective Sergeant McWhirter. But, as Paris is about to discover only too painfully, impersonating a police officer is never a good idea.

  In the second book in the series So Much Blood. Paris is appearing in his own one-man show on Thomas Hood at the Edinburgh Festival, where he finds himself falling for a gorgeous young girl with navy-blue eyes. He also finds himself being dragged into a complex murder investigation involving the death of a fading pop star; a bomb scare in Holyrood Palace and a suicide leap from the top of the Rock. Both Cast, In Order of Disappearance and So Much Blood have been adapted as serials for BBC Radio 2. In 2004 A Series of Murders was also adapted for radio. Sicken and So Die (2006), Murder Unprompted (2007), The Dead Side of the Mike (2008), Murder in the Title (2010), A Reconstructed Corpse (2010) and An Amateur Corpse (2010) have all been adapted for radio and they can now often be heard on BBC Radio 4 Extra digital radio station. There are currently 18 books in the Charles Paris series. The most recent being A Decent Interval.

  In A Decent Interval after a long period of ‘resting’, life is looking up for Charles Paris, who has been cast as the Ghost of Hamlet’s Father and First Gravedigger in a new production of Hamlet. But rehearsals are fraught. Katrina Selsey, who won the role through a television talent show, plays Ophelia. Hamlet himself is also played by a reality TV contestant, Jared Root—and the two young stars have rather different views of celebrity and the theatre than the more experienced members of the cast. But when the company reach the first staging post of their tour, the Grand Theatre Marlborough, matters get more serious, with one member of the company seriously injured in what appears to be an accident, and another dead. Once again, Charles Paris finds himself forced to don the mantle of amateur detective to get to the bottom of the mystery.

  In the Charles Paris series Simon Brett has created a character that is wholly believable. The characters are much more than caricatures, and the theatrical background is well observed. If you have worked in the theatre world then one could be certain that you would have bumped into some of the characters portrayed in this series. This series is certainly not for those who like police procedurals, as they are better off suited for those who prefer their crime to be of a lighter persuasion. The novels are always entertaining if somewhat cutting at times but they also reveal the trials and tribulations of an actor’s life in a most amusing way.

  At the end of May 2014, a new Charles Paris novel is due to be published entitled Cinderella Killer.

  His second series features Mrs Pargeter. Mrs Melita Pargeter is a widow with an obscure past, who with the help of her late husband’s friends is able to solve strange mysteries. She is a charming Londoner whose genteel demeanour belies a keen intellect and steely determination. Sadly there have only been six books in the series featuring Mrs Pargeter. The first book A Nice Class of Corpse was published in 1986. In A Nice Class of Corpse the Devereux is a nice residential hotel, which caters for a nice class of guest. But the arrival of Mrs Pargeter, an attractive widow, seems to act as a catalyst of disaster for everyone connected with the hotel. On the morning after her arrival, the corpse of one of the frailer residents is found at the foot of the main staircase, and shortly after that another death shakes the gentility of the hotel. Deciding to investigate herself, Mrs Pargeter discovers that more than one person in the Devereux has a motive for murder. The other books in the series are Mrs, Presumed Dead (1988), Mrs Pargeter’s Package (1990), Mrs Pargeter’s Pound of Flesh (1992), Mrs Pargeter’s Plot (1996) and Mrs Pargeter’s Point of Honour (1999). In Mrs Pargeter’s Point of Honour, Mrs Pargeter is hired by another widow, Veronica Chastaigne, to return all the art treasures that her late husband accumulated in a long career of larceny, Mrs Pargeter is forced to find out more than she would wish about the deceased Mr P’s “business activities” as she recreates one of his most famous scams.

  Simon Brett’s humour comes shining through in this series. Not many authors would be able to successfully write a series in which a charming middle-aged woman inherits a successful criminal empire from her dead husband, and proves more than equal to the task of using it more or less for good. Furthermore, there is a sense of continuity throughout the whole series that bodes well and keeps the series on an even keel for its fans. The whole series is a delight to read.

  Simon Brett’s third series is set in the fictional village of Fethering a fictitious village on England’s south coast (adjacent to Tarring in West Sussex). It is the residence of amateur sleuths Carole Seddon, a retired civil servant and her neighbour, Jude Nichols, whose origins are obscure. So far fourteen books have been published in the Fethering series. The first book in the series is The Body on the Beach (2000).

  In The Body on the Beach very little disturbs the ordered calm of Fethering, a pleasingly self-contained retirement town on England’s southern coast. Which is precisely why Carole Seddon, who has outlived both her husband and her career at the Home Office, has chosen to reside there. So the last thing Carole expects to encounter in Fethering is a new neighbour with but one name and an obviously colourful past. ‘Jude’ was not really Fethering . . . but neither was the body Carole found on the beach. A body, it has to be said, that has disappeared by the time the police arrive. Only Jude is ready to believe what her neighbour says she saw—and from that moment on, the two women are resolved to turn detectives.

  The other books in the series are as follows—Death on the Downs (2001), The Torso in the Town (2002), Murder in the Museum (2003), The Hanging in the Hotel (2004), The Witness at the Wedding (2005), The Stabbing in the Stables (2006), Death Under the Dryer (2007), Blood at the Bookies (2008), Poisoning at the Pub (2009), The Shooting in the Shop (2010), Bones Under the Beach Hut (2011), Guns in the Gallery (2011), Corpse on the Court (2012), which was nominated for the Goldsboro Last Laugh Award in 2013 and Strangling on the Stage (2013).

  In Strangling on the Stage when Jude agrees to lend her vintage chaise longue for the local Amateur Dramatics Society’s production of George Bernard Shaw’s The Devil’s Disciple, little does she realize she’ll end up in a starring role.

  Shrewd characterisation between Carole and Jude is what comes across and this is what makes the series so appealing. There are also enough personal quirks between the two main characters to make them interesting. Furthermore the series will appeal to those who revel in the human-interest aspect of a crime.

  Not to be out done Simon Brett started a fourth series in 2009. The Blotto and Twinks series consist of farcical whodunits set in the Edwardian period. The two main characters are the Honourable Devereaux Lyminster better known as “Blotto” who comes across as rather dim and Lady Honoria “Twinks” Lyminster who is clearly the cleverer of the two.

  So far he has written five books in the Blotto and Twinks series. The first in the series is Blotto, Twinks and the Ex-King’s Daughter. In the first book in the series it is that glorious period between the two world wars, and the exiled king of Mitteleuropa is celebrating with a visit to Tawcester Towers, the ancestral home of the Dukes of Tawcester. When the ex-king’s daughter is kidnapped, noblesse obliges blotto, the Duke’s brave and handsome son to drive off to the rescue. Sadly, he is rather staggeringly stupid—with a nickname like “Blotto”, what could one expect?—but his sister, Twinks, got all the family brains, and she is inclined to be helpful. And in more good news for the purloined princess, Blotto’s devoted valet is coming along for the ride. Plus, they’ve got a really swell car.

  The Blotto and Twinks series is parody at its best. His main targets are the conventions of detective novels, the British class system generally and the aristocracy in particular. The other four books in the series are Blotto, Twinks and the Dead Dowager Duchess (2010), Blotto,
Twinks and the Rodents of the Riviera (2011), Blotto, Twinks and the Bootlegger’s Moll and Blotto, Twinks and the Riddle of the Sphinx.

  In Blotto, Twinks and the Riddle of the Sphinx, the curse of Pharaoh Sinus Nefertop is upon Blotto so it’s up to Twinks to banish it! Yet another financial crisis at Tawcester Towers! So this time the Dowager Duchess decides to sell off the less important family possessions, which have, for a long time, been consigned to the attics of the ancestral home. Blotto and Twinks are dispatched to help the valuer as he carries out an inspection. Not much of any worth is found but then the valuer spies some Egyptian artifacts, collected by the tenth duke, Rupert the Egyptologist. In some excitement he rushes back to London to consult his reference books, leaving Blotto and Twinks alone in the attic, where they are drawn to a sarcophagus decorated with hieroglyphs. Twinks starts to translate: ‘Anyone who desecrates this shrine will be visited by the Pharaoh’s curse...’—just as Blotto prises the lid off. From that moment on a series of unpleasant incidents start happening at Tawcester Towers but it is only when the Dowager Duchess’s precious pug is struck down with a stomach bug that she instructs her son to sort things out and stop the accelerating sequence of disasters. It’s the brainy Twinks who decide the only thing to be done is to put the genie back in the bottle and so she, together with Blotto and their trusty chauffeur Corky Froggett, undertake take the sarcophagus back to Egypt, to the Valley of the Kings as only when this is done will the effect of the Pharaoh’s curse be lifted...

  The Blotto and Twinks series is hilariously funny and certainly not to be read as anything else than a clever, well observed satire of the amateur detective genre. If you have never read any of the books in the series then be prepared to think of them as a cross between an extremely traditional cosy mystery and possibly P G Wodehouse’s Bertie Wooster books. They come with an additional dose of slapstick. Whether you realise it or not they will certainly raise a smile on your face whilst you read them even if they don’t have you laughing out loud with the sheer silliness that is taking place.

  Whilst his series books are seen as mainly traditional detective fiction this has not stopped him from writing mystery plays and non-series novels. The best known of his non-series novels is A Shock to the System (1984) which was nominated for a Best Novel Edgar in 1986. It was filmed in 1990 with the screenplay by Andrew Klavan and stared Michael Caine as a business executive who takes revenge on all those around him after being passed over for promotion. A Shock to the System was nominated for the Critics Award at the 1990 Deauville Film Festival.

  He also co-wrote episode 6 of series 1 (2003) of the cosy mystery series Rosemary and Thyme which was set in beautiful English and European gardens. The episode was entitled The Tree of Death. Whilst restoring a churchyard for an upcoming fayre, Rosemary and Laura befriend the local vicar, but soon become entangled in a murder enquiry when a man is found impaled by an arrow next to an ancient yew tree where they are working. The suspects are many, and it is up to the two gardeners to save the day.

  In 1983 Simon Brett also wrote two episodes for the series Jemima Shore Investigates, which were based on the Jemima Shore novels by Antonia Fraser.

  Since 2000 Simon Brett has been the President of the Detection Club. It was announced in February 2014 that he would also be the CWA 2014 recipient of the Diamond Dagger Award for his outstanding body of work and contribution to the genre. With Simon Brett and his novels think hilarity, satire and the ability to make the reader laugh out loud. Whether you are reading about Charles Paris, or Mrs Pargeter, village antics in Fethering or the adventures of Blotto and Twinks there is something for everyone to look forward to and enjoy. If you haven’t read any of his books may I suggest that you start with any of the series that takes your fancy. For me it will always be Charles Paris. What about you?

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  Five Songs that Inspired and Influenced

  By Kristi Belcamino

  Issue 56

  I cannot imagine writing a novel that doesn’t have music mentioned in it. My debut mystery, Blessed are the Dead, also mentions the theme song for the Cops TV show, but that probably doesn’t count. I include music in my novels to not only set a mood, but, also, sometimes, to make a subtle statement. Here are my five songs in the order they appear in Blessed are the Dead.

  1. UB40’s “Red, Red Wine”

  My character, Italian-American newspaper reporter Gabriella Giovanni has pushed back her own personal tragedy for years but in this book she’s going to have to confront that dark past. Driving home one night, she has the first premonition of this happening and flips through the radio dial looking for something cheery to dissipate the shadows descending on her:

  Halfway across the Bay Bridge, I catch glimpses of the city as the hazy fog begins to dissipate and reveal a crisp night sky. Twinkling lights dot skyscraper windows. The sky behind them is not black but a deep blue like a Van Gogh nightscape. With the city spread out before me, a sense of buoyancy spreads through my chest as if I could fly. Even on the darkest nights of my life, I’ve always found comfort looking at the San Francisco skyline. Rolling down my window, inhaling the salty air, I punch the radio dial until I find something that will lift my spirits.

  I sing along to UB40s “Red, Red Wine” and reassure myself that I have nothing to worry about...

  2. “Addio del passato” from Giuseppe Verdi’s “La Traviata”

  Gabriella Giovanni is getting dumped on the streets of North Beach in San Francisco. She doesn’t want to admit that her boyfriend is giving her the old heave ho here:

  Silence. The only sound is the faint strains of opera music coming from one of the Columbus Avenue restaurants. It’s from La Traviata. For some reason, an image of Violetta, alone and unloved on her deathbed makes me sad. But I don’t cry. I never cry. I haven’t cried since the day they lowered my sister’s casket into the ground.

  3. U2 “Beautiful Day”

  Gabriella Giovanni is shaken to the core after her first conversation with a convicted kidnapper who preys on children. Then her editor tells her to get her butt up there and talk to the guy again:

  This time when I arrive at the jail, there are news trucks parked everywhere and it seems like every reporter in Northern California is trying to nab an interview. When I get to the front of the line, I submit my interview request. After a few minutes, I’m told my visit is approved for tomorrow night. An entire twenty-four hours away.

  When I find out that I don’t have to talk to Johnson today, the tension I didn’t even realize was there whooshes out of my body. I have a reprieve. I tilt my head up to the sun, feeling the warmth of its rays on my skin as I walk to my car. I put my key in the ignition and roll down all four windows. Soon, I’m flying down the highway with my hair blowing in the wind and U2’s “Beautiful Day” blasting from my speakers.

  4. Concrete Blonde “God is a Bullet”

  Gabriella Giovanni can’t help it. She’s going on a date with a cop despite all her reservations:

  Concrete Blonde’s song, “God is a Bullet,” is blaring from my car speakers as I park along Lake Merritt near Donovan’s apartment Friday night. The song talks about people who become cops because they were picked on as kids.

  I’ve never dated a cop. Most cops are hard asses with something to prove. When I became a police reporter, I vowed that it was one thing I wouldn’t do. So much for that, I think as I knock on Donovan’s door.

  5. George Winston “Autumn”

  The music in this scene reveals another side of tough-guy cop Sean Donovan that Gabriella Giovanni has not seen yet:

  His apartment is tiny—slightly bigger than my place because he has a separate bedroom—but with a stunning view. Two wall sconces softly light the living room along with votive candles scattered on tables and shelves. The soft strains of George Winston’s “Autumn” float throughout the space.

  He uncorks the wine, pours me a glass, and explains he was lucky to get into his place eight years ago. Now the nei
ghborhood is trendy, and the subsequent soaring rents reflect that. He tells me the manager keeps his rent low because she likes having a cop in the building.

  Kristi Belcamino is a writer, artist and crime reporter who also bakes a tasty biscotti. Her first novel, Blessed are the Dead, (HarperCollins, June 2014) is inspired by her dealings with a serial killer during her life as a Bay Area crime reporter. As an award-winning crime reporter at newspapers in California, she flew over Big Sur in an FA-18 jet with the Blue Angels, raced a Dodge Viper at Laguna Seca, and watched autopsies. Find out more at www.kristibelcamino.com or on Facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/kristibelcaminowriter.

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  A Sealed Fate

  By Terry Sanville

  Issue 56

  For an instant he gazed at the stars and wondered why part of the sky seemed blacker than the rest. An immense weight smothered him, pressed his body into the cold sand. He tried to scream, but his breath escaped in one last blast. Something coarse with a pungent stench crushed his face. The ocean’s roar vanished and a high ringing filled his head. This was supposed to be easy, a big payoff, he thought. Color streams rioted behind his compressed eyes. Something snapped.

  ***

  Lenny Zepeda and Roach hunched over an umbrella-shaded table at Café Lat 32. With blood-shot eyes, they squinted at the Pacific’s winter surf. They’d been in Tijuana for over a week and had failed to make any connections, except with the whores at the Adelita Bar.

  With the first signs of gonorrhea settling in, Lenny had spent their last money on a bottle of Cipro pills, with just enough held back for coffee. He glowered at Roach. “This is all your fault.”